Well, mine anyway. I've been off my loopy pills cause I forgot to get them... but I finally got them today and just took one. Anyway, my depression seems to come from thinking.

I think too much about everything. I just got done watching The Rise of the Planet of the Apes (which was EPIC btw)but I was thinking about the apes and how they felt and how they actually do animal testing and often it much much worse. But no one cares enough to actually stand up and speak up about it and those who do get cast away or if they decide to take matters into their own hands they get killed. Things like this happen everywhere every minute and it makes me sick.

What is being human other than being able to reason. We call our selves higher beings and we torture and demean eachother and our fellow animals for no reasons. It's almost as if this medicine makes me unable to reason this way, or rather let it bother me. Which in a way makes me sad as well.

This runs in my family too. I have myself wondering so many things about meanings many of which are quite outlandish but that's how I am. And the fact that I'm just smart enough to think this way, I believe, makes me more miserable.

I really often wish I was smarter because I feel like a fool 9 times out of 10 and because there are so many things I want to do like working on medicines for the brain and working on the brain its self and robotics because stuff like this just makes me excited and I'm really passionate about this stuff, but I'm truly stupid when it comes to the bookwork.

It's sad but often times I wonder if it's not for the best. I think that if i were smarter things would bother a ton more and I would become a complete basket case.

Sometimes that makes me feel smart, and I wonder too much if it's a good or a bad thing...

My brain never sleeps...

Maybe that's why I could sleep for so long.


Also on a random note. I need to go on a diet and start exercizing...I'm getting fat T^T

Oh yes, also again (as usual hehe) I'm going to contact the endo tomorrow because I just sent all my info to hom like I was told. Crossed fingers my friends.